"Like any other single mom I've tried to create a healthy example for my kids always...I have faith that we're heading in the right direction. I'm really not interested in bringing any men into our lives."--Pamela Anderson (www.eonline.com)
One of my more controversial opinions is that when a single parent's sexual relationship comes into conflict with her children's needs, the relationship should be sacrificed until she can get it together. Some possible conflicts are:
1. Your man demands too much of your time.
2. You're always anxious because you don't know what he's doing when he's not with you, leaving you few emotional reserves to deal with your children's needs.
3. You're having unprotected sex, putting your health (and life) at risk. You're also risking an unwanted pregnancy.
4. Although you're attracted to the guy, you don't really know a lot about him -- yet you're bringing him around your children, putting them at risk.
Single parents deserve love just as much as anyone else, but your children need you more.
I'm not saying that you should never accept love into your life. If you're ready, go for it, just not at the expense of your children.
Understand that your children are watching you. They're watching how you conduct yourself with the man in your life. If you're in a loving, monogamous relationship that could lead to marriage or at least a strong commitment -- and your man is good with the kids -- then you have a keeper. My issue is with women who allow their sexual needs to come before their responsibilities to their kids. Enough said.