Got time?

Is celibacy time different from sex time? I'm talking perception, of course.

From romance to foreplay to intercourse to afterglow (hopefully), time can pass in an instant. But if the sex is a bore or a chore, you're looking at the little clock on the bedside table while he's pumping away, thinking, "Geez, just come already."

If you're single, you may be thinking, "Will this time in my life ever be over?" You measure time between dates or phone calls from him. You look at the calendar in shock, realizing it's been X weeks/months/years (yikes!) since you last did the wild thang.

Time is relative, but one thing's for sure: the more joy, whether you're having sex or celibacy, the less time feels like watching a pot boil.

Good times right now

The July 2008 issue of Marie Claire reviews The Time Paradox by psychologist Philip Zimbardo. His point about our tendency to fixate on either the past, present, or future made me think about the things we fantasize about while practicing celibacy.

We wish we had a man. We wish we were having mind blowing sex. We wish we had the white house and picket fence. We wish we had the perfect little family.

While we're wishing and hoping and fantasizing about the future, the pleasures of right now are passing us by. That's a shame.

Zimbardo says, “If happiness is always in the future, then you’ll never be happy.” So true. Gotta practice joy right now. Don’t wait for the man. Start cracking yourself up right now!

Prevent accidental sex!

Don't listen to the sexiest song of all time: 'Don't Disturb This Groove' by The System. Whew, that bass! The hair! The dance moves!